Christmas Shoplifting: A man accused of stealing five perfume sets from a Tinley Park Walgreens on Dec. 22 was warned never to return to the store. He grabbed Fantasy, Mariah Carey, Britney Spears, Peluxe and Love & Glamour fragrance sets and bolted for a white van in the parking lot, police said, but cops caught up with him. The store refused to press charges.

Not a Creature Was Stirring, Not Even the Mouse: An Oak Forest man received a strange Christmas present on Dec. 27. The man pulled a gift-wrapped package from his mailbox and opened the card, which read, "Your new neighbors, The Gaftons." He found a dead mouse was inside the box.

Maybe This is a Christmas Eve Tradition: A customer threw a pizza puff and a beer bottle against the wall of the Aqua Lounge in Frankfort on Dec. 24. Then he left.

She Was Trashy and Sexy: The manager of the Orland Park Lover’s Lane this month accused an employee of hiding sexy unmentionables in the Dumpster so she could steal them. The thefts happened throughout October, police said. The items taken are worth $253. Crystal M. Erkelens, 28, of the 18400 block of Morris Avenue in Homewood, was charged with retail theft.

Fast-Food Fight: Vicky De La Torre, 35, of Blue Island, was standing in line to buy food at a Palos Hills McDonald’s on Dec. 21 when a woman slammed into her shoulder as she walked past. The two women began fighting, and then Aly De La Torre, 19, of California, joined the fray. Samantha Hernandez, 20, of Blue Island and the De La Torres were all arrested.

Penny for Your Lack of Thought: A Chicago Heights man who argued over pennies with a liquor store employee was kicked out of Unlimited Food and Liquor on Dec. 19 and then came back and threatened the employee. Corey L. Young, 41, of the 400 block of West 16th Street, was arrested.

Beer Muscles: A Chicago Heights man ran afoul of the law, police said, after he stole a bottle of Cold Steele Reserve from Ricky’s Market, drank it, then punched a door after he was asked to pay for the guzzled beer. Ricky L. Stevenson, 42, of the 1300 block of Wentworth Avenue, was charged with retail theft and criminal damage to property on Dec. 19.

— collected from this week's Patch police blotter