If she is a good athelete the coaches will find her.

I think unfortunately the mindset is to "win at all costs" and usually the price is the self-esteem of our daughters. Players should be judged on their skill and sportsmanship regardless of where it was aquired. It's also the quest for the almighty scholarship dollar that drives the parents to push their kids to their limit thinking they've given birth to the next Michael Jordan, Mia Hamm or Derek Jeter. My 6-year old daughter decided she wanted to try soccer this year. She's never played before so we put her in a NON-COMPETITIVE league so there is no pressure to win while she learns the fundamentals she needs to decide if she likes it enough to continue. I was a bit taken back after the first game to hear the mother of another player who, it seems to me is a natural, yell and bring her to tears saying she wasn't trying hard enough. It's parents like that that give organized sports a bad name.

Sounds like sour grapes to me because you can't afford to pay for club activities for your daughter. You choose to do other things with your money.

The coach selects the best players....from wherever they come.

That's a tough call- I just watched "Hoop Dreams" (I know what behind on that flick) and found it so inspiring that these kids had been scouted...but then it was sad to see them exploited for their talent.

You make it sound like a parent can put out some money and Presto! their kid is a star athlete. I think you are belittling the hard work and dedication required by club teams. My daughter plays club soccer and she practices 2 hours a day, twice a week (plus an hour of driving time each day, which means it takes 6 hours out of her school week) and at least one game a weekend (again, by the time you add travel she is devoting a signifant part of her weekend). She practices and plays whether the heat index is 102 or its 25 degrees and sleeting. She gives up vacations over spring break, she misses social events with her friends, etc. - she personally makes soccer her top priority. As far as club rules go, the only acceptable reason to miss practice or a game is for something school-related or illness/injury, but my daughter goes to practice no matter how bad she might feel. As a parent, I sometimes wish she wasn't so dedicated so that I could get a break from driving her around. As a result of her efforts and personal sacrifice over many years, she has become an excellent player with great skills. If these skills get her a position on a school team, how can you say that I somehow bought her an unfair advantage and she didn't deserve her position on the team? You can't buy what it takes to make a team. There are kids on club teams that will never be stars; the child has to put forth the effort or all the practice and coaching in the world will not make a difference.

The hope is that the coaches truly pick the best players. I am not familiar with club teams that try to give the leg up. If one can afford it and child interested, great. Again, the hope is that the coaches take who is deserving to be on the team. Unfortunately, not all coaches are unbiased all the time (may know the child from a friend or friend of friend, etc.). If one practices on own/in a club, it will improve the craft so do what is best for your child and family.

It really has nothing to do with fairness. Each one of us is dealt a hand in life and we must play it.
One way to look at it is you are already thinking of this in 5th grade. Some kids don't think about joining sports until high school, and your daughter will have a jump on them. Like one of my daughters. She was in cheerleading from 3rd grade, through the park district (which is not at all competitive). She enjoyed it and that was all that mattered to me. When she got into high school, she tried out for the school team but was way outclassed by the girls who were on the junior high teams and also took dance classes.
She was disappointed and I really felt for her, but cheerleading is not what defined her so it wasn't the end of the world.
Teach your daughter to keep things in perspective. She may try out and make it! If not, she may decide to take up something else or it will strengthen her resolve and build up her perseverance, which will be to her benefit.
If you dwell on things being 'unfair' or talk bitterly about the situation, your daughter will pick up on that and that may just kill her drive to excel.

As a coach and a parent of four, I can tell you all the money spent on "extras" sometimes doesn't matter. Some kids are naturals and some can take all the classes in the world and still not make the cut. I do encourage extra help because for the most part, it does make a difference. For instance, in cheerleading, gymnastics and dance classes do help tremendously. But if the girl is naturally uncoordinated, sometimes it doesn't matter. I see this alot. I am fair and do try to find strong points in everyone, because I believe everyone has something to contribute. I had three sons play football, baseball and basketball with no extras and they all did just fine. You do what you think is best but don't be discouraged if it doesn't bring the results you expected. Just keep encouraging your child to do thier best.

Depend